The Modern Butlers’ Journal volume 11, issue 4

International Institute of Modern Butlers

 Message from the Chairman 

It seems no year is complete without a butler falling foul of unethical behavior in the employer’s home—such as cases reported in Miami and France over the last two years. This one is from South Africa.

“ANC veteran, Mathews Phosa, is locked in an ugly public wrangle with his former butler, who accuses him [Mr. Phosa] of using theft and fraud charges to ‘silence’ him because he has information that could damage the politician’s reputation.”

The butler, Mr. Venter, had resigned and refused to hand over personal information about the employer that he, the butler, had stored on his personal laptop. “It was not like I was going to sell stories to the media; it wouldn’t have been wise for me to speak badly about my former employer. Little did I know that this would be the start of a never-ending nightmare.”

According to the newspaper, “At the heart of the row are Venter’s claims, reported at the weekend, that he saw Phosa writing a document accusing Mpumalanga Premier David Mabuza of being an apartheid-era spy.” Whereas, Mr. Phosa claimed he had received the report anonymously and had passed it on to authorities as such. So Premier Mabuza is suing Mr. Phosa, and the butler is caught in the middle.

The butler’s view is that “he was not involved in politics and merely wanted to do what was right.” He also reports that he was intimidated by the politician’s head of security, who told him to move to another city and the cases would go away; and apparently arranged for the butler’s car to be shot at—so the butler is now embroiled in  two criminal cases against this head of security because “My life is in danger.” For his part, the head of security claims the butler “lives in his own little world where he makes up stuff.”

While employed for ten months by Mr. Phosa, the relationship was warm to start but soured after Mr. Venter asked for compassionate leave to travel to Pretoria to visit his dying father. According to Mr. Venter, Mr. Phosa refused, so the butler decided to resign.

Mr. Phosa reports, however, that “I approved his first request for leave. He came back a week later with another request, and I refused. He [Venter] then resigned and offered to serve out his notice, but then said he must leave immediately—so I fired him,” Phosa said.

High drama for a butler who no doubt signed on for what he imagined to be a discreet and genteel profession.

The solution is to disengage from unethical employers—which this butler did, but he did not appear to do so because of the reported unethical act of the employer, which presumably the butler was willing to live with until he suffered a personal upset with the employer. Only then did he beat the drum about the unethical act of the employer. But, if a correct statement of his position, his flexible level of ethics and apparent dishonesty weaken his position.

And in disengaging, he violated one important rule: either disconnect completely (such as returning the files requested by the former employer); or leave with enough information to guarantee that a) any harm coming to your good person would result in their publication/turning over to the former-employer’s enemies; and b) that you have no interest in using the information, for without it, there is no leverage. Alternatively, find a police authority (if possible) that is senior to and out of the influence of the former employer, and so likely to take action to remedy the unethical behavior (and gathering as much hard evidence as possible before leaving).

Armchair advice is easy to dispense, but the above is a viable game plan for anyone finding themselves in such a tricky situation. For the butler, seeing and hearing all, is bound to see or hear something he would rather he had not seen or heard. While he normally keeps his own counsel, there are times when a higher standard of ethics in the butler than the employer must override the generally correct mantra to stay mum. This is a decision we each make according to our own standards and codes, but the situation can be most harrowing, sometimes leading to rash action or inaction. Hence this blueprint for action may prove useful.

*Dowager: a widow with a title (or property) derived from her late husband.

The acerbic (sharp and forthright) wit of this character, married to the subtle understanding of the workings of the English class system—within which our profession developed over the centuries—helps put in perspective the development of the traditional, conservative and mute butler persona. The Dowager Countess of Grantham mouths astute witticisms (zingers such as the one above), but also frequently provides comments that betray the dismissive view of others held by those who try hard to maintain the illusion of their own superiority in the absence of any actual production and contribution to others: the idle rich, yes, but also the criminal class, and others, no matter their station in life, who try to put down rather than build up. In actual fact, as Downton Abbey-philes know, the Dowager Countess of Grantham character does care about her own family, at least, and is portrayed as basically a kind person, despite being trapped into forwarding the expectations of her too-fast-disappearing milieu (a person’s social environment).

Butlers in the Media

What do overboots for children (boots to wear over regular shoes when in the snow), a restaurant in Australia,  and a Carpet, Tile, & Grout Cleaning company in Florida all have in common? They are all called The Butler and represent the latest commercial adoption of our profession to advertise superior standards in their own line of work.

And where else are “Butlers” being employed these days for the same reason? At a dentist in Japan, a photo booth in Australia, the public beach in San Diego, the wilds of Scotland (a forest ranger turned “Picnic Butler”), and a “Personal Shopping and Styling Butler” in Hong Kong.

Along the same lines, what MBJ would be complete without some comment on butler robots? We have Sigourney Weaver to thank for wanting a robot butler after starring in new movie called Chappie alongside a police droid reprogrammed to feel and think like a human. Ms. Weaver is looking for a helpful and thoughtful robot at home. “I’m sure you could program a robot to do all kinds of useful things. I think they’re trying to create a butler robot for people, which would be useful. I’d like a cheerful robot, for company. ‘Would you like a cup of tea?’ That’s the kind of robot I would want…that’s my level; not very destructive but lovable.” Hmmm, anyone feel qualified to apply?

The Chairman was interviewed for an article in this in-flight magazine.

 Letters to the Editor

We recently completed the first phase of butler training at the largest construction project in the Western Hemisphere—BahaMar Resort and Rosewood at BahaMar—an interesting (and a first) mix of several brands sharing the same property. Some of the letters received after we left show that we are achieving our mission, as laid out on the Institute’s home page:

“In this tradition, the Institute is now focused on a new phase that we see as the future need and direction of the industry: pioneering the nurturing of individuals who can bring about a greater zest for, and appreciation of, life, both in the people they serve and in themselves. This means our training includes the mechanical skills of butling—be they orchestrating a party for 200 or the acquiring, manning, and managing of a large estate. But more importantly, drawing on our backgrounds as counselors and teachers, the training brings about an understanding of people, whether employees, vendors, guests, or employers, and how to make them all work together in their different roles to the benefit of all. Life did not come with a manual: we seek to remedy that lack in the specific sphere of providing service to others.”

“The little training I received [he arrived half way through the training] was truly mind-boggling and life changing. I came in with the mindset of ‘I won’t need much training as I’ve been a butler,’ yet I have learned more in ten days than in two years in the field…. I will truly enjoy your return in October.” DB

“I thought I knew everything I needed to know with regard to Butler Service and was so wrong…. I am forever changed.” DW

“I want to express my sincere gratitude and appreciation for all the training and mentoring that I have received over the past three-to-four weeks, which has really transformed my life professionally and personally, sending my life and career path on the up and up.” LH

“The training is so real and true that we have practiced it in our lives and so made us better people, able to deal with different situations that were hard to deal with in the past, and which also will be so useful to apply to our guest for better results. For me personally, I needed this training at this stage of my career, I have waited for it so long and finally I have it, and it is worth it and exceeded my expectations as well as everyone else’s in the team.” MA

“I may have never said this before, but you both have made such a wonderful impact on my life and the opportunities I have embarked upon…I am a butler in all that I do because of you. Thank you!” GB

Soap and Fruit Carvings

We reported earlier on the fruit carvings of one enterprising butler in a boutique, private hotel in Florida, and wanted to share a couple of his fruit carvings:

And here a couple of samples of his soap carvings.

Bear in mind, this butler, whose name is Kobi, did not go to sculpture school or have any outside assistance in making these sculptures, but simply recognized that creativity, driven by caring and directed toward personalization, lie at the heart of superior service. He saw an opportunity with these normally mundane offerings of soap and fruit, that generally are simply presented as nature made them, or cut into smaller pieces (or for soaps, usually in simple, geometric shapes) to create something valuable and noteworthy for the guests. I have seen the same in the Maldives, for instance, where the butlers carve elaborate dhonis (traditional sailing boats) out of coconut shells and fiber for their guests. In fact, we still have some on shelves in our houses in Florida and the Rockies, because the care that went into their creation carries great power.

Kobi offers these pointers for anyone wanting to go down the same road with soap:

“Quite a while ago I bought a large block of special soap that can be melted in the microwave, have color/scent added to it, and be molded back into a soap bar. The good thing about this is that it is soft and very convenient to work with; and secondly, it is perfect to practice carving, as you can simply re-melt it and use it again for a new carving, instead of wasting soap bars when your creation is not up to standards.

For this sculpture of an egret (the white bird), I did use a large chunk of soap, but the bird is not one whole piece: the wings, the beak, and the pedestal were made separately and attached to the body using quite a simple technique that I learned accidentally. Originally, I attempted to use a glue gun to glue the pieces together (as suggested in different references I had read) but the glue wouldn’t stick to the soap directly. What I noticed however, is that when the hot tip of the gun touched the soap, it melted. So I simply began to use the glue gun to melt together the different sections. Simple, effective, and much cleaner than using glue.

It has been quite an interesting journey, I must say. Thank you for your interest in it.”